I Love My Friends

Each and every one of them is kick ass. A wonderful example of their kick-assery is the amasian, who is willing to let me have some of her single-use film cameras. There is Taylor, who knows all of my secrets and keeps most of them. Another is my clarinet compadre who I played croquet with last night. Another is the awesomesauce ginger who understands me, and is willing to talk, even at 9:30 at night when I'm in tears. There are more, but I shall stop at one more, the ever brilliant Lily.

It was about 4 last night, when I began to go stir-crazy, as I do every night if I haven't gotten out of the house to walk somewhere or do something. I started messaging those within walking distance, then I realized she was online. In about an hour, we met to photograph, I even had pudding with me, since I've no money for anything until I've a new digital.

Anyway, I ended up with about 250 photos of her. I've an idea of how Harriet (mum's camera) is similar and different than Colin, and I know that I much prefer my man to her lady. Oh, and if I didn't already hate auto focus, I do now.

Anyway, below you get to see the photos that I (like that I) took yesterday. And my drawing for Illustration friday should be done in no time, woohoo. Separate post for that. So, listen to some good music, and have a nice day.

With love,
Sarah

Click Each "X" To See Even More^^

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Photography & Painting

This comes in two parts, Photography and Painting.... With a third little snippit of rambles at the end. Remember, you love me anyways, quirky is more fun then dull and boring.

Photography
So, my Digital Camera, Colin, is on his last leg. He no longer turns off fully, so I must pop his batteries after the lense goes back in. He also likes to half turn off after every few photos. This leads to missed shots and corrupted files. Needless to say, I'm saving up for a camera (who wants to get me a Nikon D3000? Pretty Please with Cherries). Until then, I will still use Colin when I'm at home, and mum's camera. I've a horse show to shoot the 11th, so I'm getting to know hers better. (I've named it Harriet, since she never names anything of imporance like she should.)
Not only am I using Harriet, but I'm taking this as an opportunity to really dive into the world of film. So, I'm on the hunt for film cameras and film, both expired and not. I've two of mum's three film cameras (neither work, but I still love them and will name them,) my original 110 Crayola camera, some random pink one I was given as a secret santa ($5 or less....), and until I get a working 35mm of my own, my Grandmum is letting me borrow hers (I've named her Francine.) I've been pretty much searching through the house for film (I've 6 expired rolls, one being in use ATM), and single-use vacation cameras. I've a friend who is willing to let me have a few that she got for free. If I didn't already have a fru-fru pet name for her, I'd give her one now. I just wish I could Pay her back.
Anyway, below is a picture of my current collection of film and cameras (plus you can see the slip from Walmart, I dropped off a roll today, my coin jar, my digital camera case, and my jar of Marmite). Then, on to painting.

Painting
So, today after I took Francine for an hour and a half walk outside, I decided to schlepp all of my paints and canvases and boards outside. Lots of spazzing and flicking, messing around and a little bit of trying to make something that doesn't suck. Really, I've no niche, I've no real skill at painting. So, I'm pretty much just messing around and trying to figure out what I'm gonna want to practice over and over, to be good at. Any suggestions are TOTALLY loved. Fo' Sho'.
Oh, and a random blue leaf-ed tree that I painted. Why....? I dunno.

So, now, random spazzing.

My camera is dying. My Zune, Ronaldo, is going as well. I've the worst timing ever. Marching band is coming up, as well as school. I need to get a job. Damn. Okay, I'm done complaining.

In other news that won't make sense to you, but I'd like to get it off my chest. I tried. I'm not sure if it was bad timing on my part, or if my efforts are in vain, and that's to hard to admit.? I'm to impaitient. Grrr, Arggg. Imma go sleep or something? I dunno.

With love,

Sarah

Inspiration, Friends, School and Assistance Wanted

My ideas and inspiration come from different places. Life, music, the internet, movies, television, and the people I meet to name some of said places. Some times I jump into whatever I'm doing, feeling totally uninspired and drained of creativity. When that happens, one of three things may happen. A)I end up kicking ass, B)I end up a terrible hot mess or C)I end up having fun while creating a terrible hot mess. Sometimes I wonder if there is a better way? You know, a way to find inspiration without causing chaos, without any disappointment of your work not turning out how you hoped.
I fear that I may have lost two friends by the end of the summer. But, when I say lost, I mean they will still be my friends, but, we will rarely ever speak or see each other. I will admit, I am not taking it well, being almost completely ruled by my emotions. I've told this to one of the two, the one who is moving, otherwise known as Taylor, and she smacks me. I don't think she gets it totally. I watched her move from her old school to mine, and I saw how much she talked to her old friends. She's moving again, and I get to be an old friend, I'm afraid I'll lose one of my closest friends. Then again, there is a difference between her other old friends and I; My mum would drive me to the ends of the earth to make me happy. I'm sure hers would as well, but still. My mum is awesome. Taylor also hates how I doubt I will see our mutual friend as well. I wish she could see it from my perspective, to understand why I feel how I feel when with both of them, and where my doubts come from. I don't want to lose him, as a friend or more if I can muster up a facade of sanity, but we've never hung out the two of us, and I doubt he really wants too. (I'll stop now, I could go on and on about how I feel third-wheelish, but I won't. Just know, I feel it quite frequently, in many different groups of people.)
School begins next month, my last year as a high schooler. I am excited and petrified at the same time. My work load is larger than it was my junior year, and most doubt my ability to keep up with it and succeed, but still. I have to, if I want to get into the school I want to get into the school I want to get in to. Yeah, I'm going to get in, so this year I will kick ass.
Last thing before I sign off, and post one of the last photos I took of Taylor by herself (Long shutter speed, flash and glowin' stuff). It may possibly sound as though I care for nothing of what I attempt to create, and only care for "popularity," if you could call it that. But, I don't really care. Comments make my day. It's one thing to see who sees what via stats on blogger draft. It's another to hear you like what I've posted, or have a suggestion for me to make it better. I'm done being awkward in my quest to ask for your input.

With Love,
Sarah

(Click for Larger View)

.:IF:. Star Gazing

"If Only You Were Real"

7 1/2" by 5 1/2" of recycled sketchbook paper with Pilot and Bic pen

(Click To See larger Image)

This is my first drawing for Illustration Friday, at Illustrationfriday.com. The first time I check out the site, the theme couldn't be any more ironic. One of those 'Story of my life' sort of moments, but I did it any way. I tweaked it with irfanview, but all in all, I like it. Plus, I imagine I know how she feels. In the back of her mind, she had an inkling of what it would be like, to just stand there watching the stars, being held by someone who truely cares, while she feels as though she stands alone.

With Love,

Sarah

Cha-Cha-Changes

Let's just say I was tired of the long-ass blog name. And I've begun to feel as though my life is static, unmoving and never evolving. So, new name to the blog, and I'm working on a banner of some sort. I like it better, and this way I wont spell the url wrong, which I've done on many occasions.
I've many paintings in the works, but I keep getting distracted, right when I plan on working on them. It's frustrating, as is finding yourself liking someone. You know they can't like you back, and you try to stop liking them, but then they show how smart or witty they are, and you're stuck even more. If anything, it makes me feel lonely, which I detest. So, I'm left trying to portray the loneliness and then the anger I feel for myself because I feel lonely. It doesn't turn out well.
On a happier note, I've had my sketchbook Lotus for almost a month now, and he's about half-full. I took a bit of a break from drawing every day, but as of last night, he and I are re-acquainted, and the few bits of world history I remember have been illustrated. I also found this site, Illustration Fridays, and am glad to say I think I will start partaking. It is always easier when someone comes up with the idea for me. Some times, I just can't think in a coherent enough manner, even for myself. The ideas get jumbled up and start wrestling each other, trying to get to the top of the pile. That just makes them harder to sort through.
I'm quite discouraged in my attempts to hold an art show. Venues don't like short-term renting, no one is willing to help me out. I'd do a solo show, but I lack the confidence in my own work, and the patients and work ethic to produce that much art.
I think I'll go draw a bit, maybe even write a bit. I'm not quite sure. Have a good day, oh and check out the picture at the end of the post. I light painted with taylor and Matt the other day, and this was one of my favorite shots.

With love,
Sarah

Oh look, tis a Sketch Dump

As promised, Here is a dump of sketches, as well as a drawing and random page that's music inspired. Click each for the large image.

The sketchbook pages are drawn on with various pens and markers, along with a little bit of coloured pencil, prismacolour to be exact. You see faces, "Repo the Genetic Opera" 'Fan Art,' hands, different parts of the face, random spazzy words and.... I've a thing for drawing tongues. More specifically licking things. Don't ask.

With Love,

Sarah

Frustration, Photographs and the Future.

So, this is three parts. The first is incredibly angsty, but may explain some of the art you may see in the future.
First,

"Frustration is a common emotional response to opposition. Related to anger and disappointment, it arises from the perceived resistance to the fulfillment of individual will. The greater the obstruction, and the greater the will, the more the frustration is likely to be. Causes of frustration may be internal or external.

  --- Wikipedia"

I am incredibly frustrated. There are many things bothering me, none I wish to discuss. Just remember 331. Tomorrow it will be 330. I've so many things eating at me, productivity tends to decrease. Sorry.

Secondly, I've been taking a lot of random photos recently, and I'm not quite sure why. Or where my ideas come from. If you check http://creepdigsphotography.deviantart.com/ you can see some of the stuff I've been/will be posting. When I get a chance.

Lastly, I've taken photos for a sketch dump, finished another painting and have been working on planning things out. I feel bad not updating more, with more art. This is supposed to be an art blog. Sorry.

With Love and delayed shutter speed,
Sarah

This Contains Minimal Art-ness

Yesterday was an incredibly long and exausting day. But, I had quite a bit of fun, with minimal problems. It was fine in the beginning, but as people started to show up, I was feeling more and more... twitchy? Eventually I attached myself to a brilliant asian and her brilliant ginger counter part. After a while, we broke off from the group, joined by Taylor and Matt. Five people, that's a number I can deal with for the most part. There was pretty much, no drawing by anyone. There was mostly running around the park, dollar store, wegmans and little foresty areas, and taking pictures.
What did we learn? Many people fear bugs, or are unsettled by them. Messages before FB Events. Bookmark for your book. Yay!
In other news, I feel quite odd. It may effect my doodles. Meh.

With love,
Sarah

Outsides, Feelings and Splats

After painting for a total of 6 plus hours, broken into two three-ish hour sessions, many things had happened. My outsides were almost totally covered in paint. Arms, legs, face, neck, and everything in between, seemed coated in red and purple and blue and green. I love the feel of paint on my skin, and the smell of paint, and what it's like to create something with it. The outsides of the house showed signs of my presents as well. There were large splats of blue and purple on the house, door and the cement. The dog has a blue spot on the top of her head, and the picnic table that I paint on, it's a lost cause. Finger painting, splatter painting, and layering with pallet knives in the dark have taken a toll.
The first of the painting 'sessions' I had two others with me. So, I wasn't about to dance around in pigtails as I do when I paint alone. It's very hard for me, to try to be calm and composed as I paint, and it showed. Taylor asked me about my current state plenty of times, but what else is new? Even my splatter painting was stiff and strained. What can I say? I cannot perform with an audience that I'm trying not to appear too terribly odd in front of.
The second session was a much needed one. To be frank, after the first one ended my anger and frustration started to build, impairing my ability to focus and teach the oboe. It took cookie dough, Voltaire and talking it out to ginger #1 to calm me down. When I went out to paint, the sun was just starting to set. I loosened up, figured out a few ideas, and stitched together my plan for the 'Big Azz Canvas.' I painted from about quarter to nine until almost midnight, using a flashlight only when necessary, stopping for a drink and to apply bug spray. I may have finished more paintings, one being a spazzy face done to kill time, but the other is a sort of abstract-y face that I may like. I don't know.
I get to spend some time today with people at the park, possibly drawing and causing a ruckus, which is always fun. I still need to do a sketchbook dump, when I can focus, and post some shots of paintings in progress.

With Love,
Sarah

Don't Wake Me Up; I Am Still Dreaming.

Lyrical Title, semi-related to the post... Sort of? I've been listening to 'Don't Wake Me Up' by the Hush Sound quite a bit, so I've been working on a painting that seems to be influenced it more and more every time I work on it. But, then again, it may turn out to be a spazz and nothing related to it. I'm not sure yet. But, I do know that the song helps to capture the state of disquietude I seem to dwell in... partially.
I've been going to school 4 days a week this summer, to work on art projects. I haven't finished much, and I doubt I will any time soon. I've done quite a few sketches, of my 'classmates' and bikes & cars from the parking lot. The art teacher is really cool, which helps.
I started my first attempt at painting a still life, and I doubt I will finish it. My heart isn't into it, so I can take it home, gesso and then paint over it.
I've plenty of things I should be doing but won't, so I'll let you go. Maybe I'll take pictures for the next sketch dump, or doodle, or use pastels for the hell of it.
Who knows? It's summer and I've free reign.

With Love,
Sarah

Finished Painting:: Mind. Blown.

I am incredibly excited. I've been working on it for a while, acrylic paint on canvas board, but it's finally done!

Mind. Blown.

Detail Shots:

I am so excited! I will not be able to sleep.

With love,

Sarah

They Shouldn't Let Me In

To art stores, that is. I walk into one with a wallet 'full' of cash and a 40% off coupon, and I practically wet myself. In half an hour, I've found myself taking home paint, gesso, brushes, knives and canvas. It was the most amazing thing ever. Well, sort of.

I've been trying to get a handle on everything non-artsy, but It's hard when I get my ideas when I'm trying to be productive. But, at least I've "summer school" tomorrow. I get to go and just creep/draw. Also, I finally got a card reader, so I can use my new 4gb SDHC card! I am incredibly excited!

Also, because I can, My Motto in Life. I try to:
a) Be Happy
b) Learn Every Day
c) Try something new
d) keep most of my blood inside my body at all times.
e) Check for paper before you squat
f) Life is sacred and none have the authority to end that of another

Now, like the English language, there are exceptions to the rules. Like, I have been known to give up my happiness so that others can be happy. And those summer days, where I do a total of zero educational things. But, rule 'D' is the one I do my best to follow closest. Sure, I will give blood. But that is it. My blood.rt in my life, but it's difficult when I get my ideas at random times while trying to be productive.

So yeah, I'll stop rambling and go work on some stuff now...

With Love,
Sarah